Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I'm like, not good at living.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize