god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
