Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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