is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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