therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Randomize