There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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