I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'm gonna fight the coyote
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
