i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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