Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
