I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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