Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
