Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
