Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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