Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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