You're so nebulous sometimes
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Randomize
