Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
