What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
that is very illegal...i love you.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
