WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I want to be your penis for a week.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
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