Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize