I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
