I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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