I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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