i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
sex in a hospital.. check
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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