the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I just found a bag of teeth...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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