She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
