Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
