O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
