Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize