piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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