Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
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