check it out our google latitudes are spooning
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
