it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
