Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
this will be a night to untag.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
