we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
COCAINE IS GR8
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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