Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
