Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
You can't just leave with hair like that
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
