Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
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I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
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