Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Randomize
