Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
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What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
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I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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