Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
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i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
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Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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