i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help