Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
