so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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