He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Let's get the cat blown out
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
