I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
