the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
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