Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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