So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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