and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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