What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
