is your mom at the bar?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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